January 30, 2009

Vacancies Anyone?

For some time now I have been at home taking care of Caesar. He is now 5 months old and it feels like my time at home should be up. The plan is to go back to school in August to complete my bachelors. From now until then, it makes about 6 months. Lately I find myself just waiting, I hate waiting. It not only feels like I’m only waiting for school to resume for me, it feels like my entire life is on a hold. I feel the need to be more active, move forward, and give more to Caesar than simply taking care of him.

Although I enjoy being at home with Caesar watching him grow, teaching him to eat … I still get this gut feeling that I should be doing more. Every woman probably would enjoy staying at home with the kids, when they are this tiny and enjoyable. I also feel like it’s the best to stay at home with your child especially when they are at a stage where they will do most of their learning. Sometimes I do feel guilty even thinking about leaving him, missing out on some of the special moments; I will always worry about him when I’m away. There will definitely come a day that I will only want to stay home with my baby full-time, maybe after I’ve been exposed to the hectic working world; I give it a few years.

Tonight after Caesar went to bed, I dug up my old files from my Communications class, and found a cover letter and resume. It has crossed my mind too many times that I should go to work until it’s time to go back to school. I looked them over and brushed them up a little; they definitely need more work. I’m thinking about sending a few applications out; there is no one particular job I’m interested in but I have a few places in mind. Let’s see if any opportunities are going to turn up for us.

1 comment:

Beth said...

Interesting read... I think every woman does go through these thoughts
When my turn comes, this is my plan:
Have stay home with my babies until the youngest is old enough to go to school and then I will go back to work. OR set up a online something and work from home. But definately, I want to be there for my babies and my man.... but it will all work out in time.

Take care woman and embrace it all!